Sign up for DINNER! Or STARVE!!!

Hello hello dear readers! Happy Wednesday-after-Easter! How’s your week been? Mine’s been lovely, in fact I have a story to tell you!

Imagine if you will, there was a rector at a church called… let’s call it “Ascension.” And for the sake of argument suppose one of the receptionists who also works in the youth office bounced up to him and they had a conversation something like this:

“Kelsey”: Fr. Jonathan, could I please have your permission to use the church parking lot to douse a cake in alcohol, and set it on fire?
Rector: …
“Kelsey”: …
Rector: …How about you explain this one. [Note him not immediately shutting this down.]

(“Kelsey” launches into a quick but thorough explanation about consulting with a team of professional pyrotechnics to figure out a way to make a cake with ingredients that WOULDN’T burn or explode, and the need of having a place to do the first round of experiments.)

“Kelsey”: . . . And anything that DIDN’T explode would then need to be taste-tested by the church staff, so could I also please invite the staff to come outside to watch?

WHAT might “Fr. Jonathan the Rector” have said to “Kelsey”? Will her dream of learning to flambé be extinguished?! To learn the epic response of this entirely hypothetical scenario you’ll have to read the announcements!!

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Youth confirmation, This Sunday, Hunt Rooms 12:30ish
Hey! Youth who are getting confirmed! Guess what! You’re meeting this Sunday after church! And guess when! (12:30 like always?) YES!!!!! But guess WHERE? (Hunt rooms again?) YEAH! And guess what else?!?! (Pizza?) Now that’s just spooky 😳… But but BUT I’ll bet you didn’t know there was going to be a DOCUMENT included in this now didja?!?! Bamboozled again!!

This Sunday: Leaders YES! Youth, NO!
Youth! Enjoy the (hopefully) lovely spring-ish weather of Sunday evening with family or friends anywhere but at Ascension! Because we will not see you for a CAYG event until the Marathon Overnight on Saturday April 30.

Leaders Only! Join us this Sunday evening for the Lasagna Rehearsal Dinner where we will eat yummy food and go through the events of the next weekend, and maybe even play a game!
When: Sunday, April 24, 6-7:30
Where: Parish Hall
What: Rehearsal Dinner!!!!
Actually What: Lasagna, Garlic Bread, Salad, Dessert of some kind!
I’m allergic to this dinner: TEXT ME OR ALEX ASAP so we have time to get you a yummy dinner that won’t kill you! (That always makes us very sad and we don’t want to break our current streak.)

Lasagna Dinner Sign-Up

So a bunch of you have signed up for the Marathon Overnight (hooray!) BUT you HAVEN’T signed up for DINNER (panic and discord!)!!! We will NOT be providing our typical CAYG pizza, and snacks are entirely dependent on everyone remembering to bring snacks to share… So if you want to guarantee dinner, SIGN UP FOR DINNER HERE!!!

Submit Your “You May Ask” Questions!

So this May, rather than focusing on a long overarching series and cramming it into a single month, we’ll be holding a few YOU MAY ASK nights! Where Alex will call upon all his years of training in Seminary, Church Ministry, Fatherhood, and being British-Turned-American to answer YOUR tricky questions about God, Faith, and Life! So follow this different link and send him YOUR questions!

BUT because we are called to be kind-hearted, we will give Alex time to ~~run away and hide~~ prepare. There isn’t a question limit, and you’ll notice how it’s anonymous! All we need is to know your HOUSE because it would be very disappointing if your awesome question was asked but presented to the wrong group.

It’s Show Time!
Really looking forward to seeing more awesome performances this spring! If you have a performance, big game, Scout awards ceremony, public court hearing, or art show, reply to this email and let us know so we can advertise and come!!

The upcoming schedule (That WE know about):

Matilda: Trinity Christian School
SEVERAL of our youth are in the cast AND crew!
April 28, 29, 30, May 5, 6, 7
7pm

Pittsburgh Symphony Student Side-by-Side concert: Heinz Hall
TWO of our talented musicians will be playing cello and violin!
Tuesday, May 10, 7pm
For more info click here.

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And now dear readers, here at the end I have a confession to make. Brace yourselves. You know the hypothetical scenario I presented where “Kelsey” spoke to her “Rector” asking for permission to set a spiked cake on fire in the church parking lot? I… I misled you. It really happened… and “Kelsey” was… in fact… me.

And the weather was so miserable on Tuesday they let me light that bad boy inside.